11

Job hunting is a pain in the ass until the best circumstances, a long tedious selling of oneself just so one can have money to pay the bills. It’s harder to find employment with a ten year gap in employment history, I figured out, because I couldn’t explain the gap until an interview. I think most employers assumed the worst when they saw it, not that I was a house mom.

With a lot of luck, and some minor workings, I managed to find one. Bottom of the totem pole work, cashier at a convenience store, but I’ll happily take what I can get at the moment. The area manager is an overbearing ass, the store manager is a decent fellow, and the assistant manager is a funny little string bean who I really enjoy talking to. My new co-workers are a mixed bag, but they seem pretty nice. I think I’ll be fine here for a while. Thank the Divine.

Angie has disappeared the last few days. I’m not exactly worried. It’s a stunt she’s pulled since she was sixteen and it was her birthday Friday. I’m uneasy though. Something about it doesn’t smell right.

The milk and honey showed up on our doorstep again. Mom says it wasn’t her and Jack says the same. I want to assign a benign meaning to it, but something niggles in the back of my mind. I don’t like it. We’re not quiet about our witchiness, but this feels like a taunt. Until I figure out what’s going on with this, I’m on guard. I hate to worry. Maybe it’s time I set a trap for this unknown person.

Blessed Be.

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10

Jack hasn’t stopped badgering me about the Gods. I love his ability to focus on a subject for days on end, but in this instance, I really wish he wasn’t so good at it. Mom laughs every time he brings the subject up to me. Says it’s the price I pay for such a smart, perceptive son.

In dodging Jack’s questions though, I’ve come to think on all the reasons why I respect and petition the chaos Gods with the level of reliability I do. Both answers are true, in that I do like how they roll and I honestly believe it’s better to stand in the eye of the storm. There are less volatile versions of chaos than Set and Loki, on the other hand. Why these two? Set is God of the storm and the foreigner, of endless wandering and death in the scorching desert. Cunning Loki, silver-tongued and the destroyer of the world in His need for revenge. Maybe it’s because I have something my sister calls a ‘wild soul’. Even though I’m contemptuous of my fellow humans in general, I enjoy being out among them with the same kind of fascination a scientist gives to research of a subject. And while I am a homebody kind of person, that doesn’t stop me from wanting to go and go and go. Just to see places. Maybe They’re a reflection of my desire to back out into the world an explore all the secret places I can find. And maybe I will do exactly that, once Jack is grown. I can wait eight more years.

For now I have to divert Jack’s attention to some other thing. He’s really not old enough to have dealings with chaos. I think I’ll start him on the light and birth Gods for now. Best to give his spiritual education a good foundation. And then I’ll teach him about the stellar Gods. He does want to go to Mars, after all.

Otherwise, life is good. Quiet. Ryan Reynolds said it in one of his movies. “Boring is best.”

Blessed be.

09

Ugh.

Daylight Savings Time rolled into the middle of my work week like a tank through a brick wall. I hope the moron who thought this ridiculous way to deal with the time remaining at the end of a day had some sort of nasty crab infestation. I hate DST. What a nuisance.

Ra loves it though. He was loafed on the windowsill, soaking up the sun before I even woke up this morning. It’s my day off today, so I’m jam packed with a list of housework about as long as my arm and that jerk gets to lounge all day. I have to get it all done before I pick up Jack from school. Maybe I can con Angie into helping me with the housework. She hates it, but is easy to bribe with chocolate. Speaking of, I have to hide my chocolate stash so my mom stops stealing it. I honestly can’t wait until me and Jack have our own place again.

The second murder of ravens disappeared. I don’t know what happened for sure, but I think the first murder drove them off. The quiet in the morning unsettles me now.

Someone left a bowl of milk and honey next to our doorstep too. A greeting? Or a warning? I don’t like these kinds of mysteries.

Blessed Be.

08

It was nice to have mom out of the house for almost a week. She went to California for vacation, even though she hates the place. Too liberal in her opinion. I find it funny that she’s a witch and yet has such a conservative mindset. Takes all kinds, I guess.

I wasn’t so lucky with Angie being around though. Once mom had headed out, she reverted to her less savory habits of being out all night and sleeping all day, general bitchiness and emotionally poking everyone around her with sharp sticks. Good thing she doesn’t have her own children, nor wants any. She’s a great aunt for Jack and doesn’t bring her drama around him, but she hasn’t got a maternal bone in her body. Good thing she knows that. Makes her scrupulous with birth control.

Otherwise, it’s been a quiet week. Work, home, Jack is doing great in school. Nothing major has blown up in our faces. Yet.

Something distressing, though really minor, did happen though. Jack asked me to teach him about the chaos Gods I favor. Worship isn’t the word I ever use, because I’m not that kind of person. I’ve seen what happens when people worship. They turn into that lunatic who came into my shop last week. I petition the Gods and they help or don’t, according to my petition and their feeling on the matter.

I don’t want to teach him about Them just yet. Chaos Gods are tricky by nature and aren’t for the faint of heart. Set especially isn’t one to trifle with. Why do I favor them, my friend Jeff once asked. I figured it was better to stand in the eye of the storm, so to speak. Also, I like how They roll.

Blessed Be.

07

It is very late as I write this. Very, very late and I’ll sum up the week I’ve had since my last post with one word.

Shenanigans.

It was one of those weird weeks that shouldn’t possibly exist, yet does. The day after my last post, another murder of ravens moved into the neighborhood and now there’s a war between the two groups. I can’t tell if it’s a prank war or a real one, but these newest ravens have decided to conduct raids on the first murder an hour before dawn. Good thing it’s still winter, at the moment, but I dread this stretching into the early morning conflagration of summer.

On the work front, a fundy came into my store to by scratcher tickets and lost her mind when I stood up. My pentacle had fallen outside my shirt while I was bent down and she was insensate with Christian rage when she saw it. Called for my manager and made a huge scene. I’m not fired, my coworkers don’t care, and the regulars who were in the store rolled their eyes at the fundy’s antics, but damn. My boss, Josiah, is a good guy and brushed off the problem, though he did pull me descetely aside and tell me, next time, oust her from the store. He doesn’t like it when customers get crazy like that with his employees.

I think I’m going to start casting a circle around my store before I start shifts, to keep those kinds and the dangerous ones out. Yeah, it’s an extra ten minutes early to work, but worth it. And a charm bag. Just in case.

Today was Jack’s birthday though! I picked him up from school early and took him to a birthday lunch, with a green birthday cake. Took him to a movie, the LEGO Movie 2 which was pretty good, and we tore into gifts, dinner and more cake when we got home.

No sign of Cindy for two weeks now. I wonder if she moved out? An opportunity missed. I’d have liked to have known her better. There’s all the time in the world though. Maybe I’ll snare the next one with my bumbling courtship.

Blessed Be.

06

My birthday passed with almost no comment, beyond an enthusiastic ‘Happy Birthday’ from Jack and a little birthday cupcake he made for me with a single purple candle aflame on top. Perfect way to spend my birthday and leagues above the last five, where my ex-husband always found something to whine and tantrum about.

Lupercalia was a fun little feast us four held in honor of the day, and also stood in for my birthday dinner we didn’t do the night before. I can live with that. Sharing a holiday with a birthday is terrible, most of the time. This year’s was nice and quiet, my preferred state.

The month of the Ash Tree starts tonight though, and I feel a calling to hold a vigil for it. I’m not much in tune with the Ash, we don’t mesh well since I’m more of a Rowan kind of girl, but maybe it’s time to change that. After I finish here, I’ve got to go set up my space and circle. And hang a damned note on the door telling people to go away. Mom and Angie have been randomly poking their noses in my room. They won’t just come out and tell me they’re worried about me. Oh no. They have to invade until I get annoyed enough to snap at them first.

Joke’s on them. I’ve got a ten year old who’s taught me a whole new meaning to the word ‘patience’. I can outlast their prying.

Speaking of Jack, I think I’ll invite him into the circle tonight and begin on his instruction to the Trees. I think he’ll like it. That’s the kind of esoteric knowledge he loves to collect, just because.

Blessed Be.

05

The secular New Year and Imbolc came and went without me really noticing. Life kind of kicked us all in the teeth, though some more severely than others. On a sort of brighter note, I got the extra time I wanted.

Sent the cheat his copy of my response to his divorce petition and he just sat on it, I guess. Lazy bastard. The court sent him a notice that our divorce proceedings were now cancelled because of the delay in him initiating the next step. Have to start all over again. Divorce is a little expensive. $800 in total, $400 per person. Which is a nuisance.

On the other hand, I can afford it, no problem now that I have a job again. Nothing glamorous, mind, cashier work for a gas station. Ten years of being a stay-at-home mom left my resume pretty lean and I have to take what I can get. Happily, the days I work are the days Jack is either over at his father’s house, or my mother can pick him up from school. I don’t see Cindy much because of it, either, but that’s probably for the best. Getting tangled up with anyone who isn’t sticking around is a good way to get my heart broken.

A murder of ravens moved into the reservoir behind the house. They’re up with the sun and their happy caterwauling makes me smile every morning. A good omen. Corvids are my favorite. I think I need to do this blogging thing more regularly. I’m a lot calmer now than I was when I started.

Blessed Be.

04

Solstice is coming up faster than I expected, but I also had a very pleasant surprise. We have a new neighbor, Cindy. I’m a little ashamed to say she brought us cookies, instead of the other way around.

Which I am about to rectify in about 30 minutes.

Cindy. It’s a pretty name for a woman about my age, a sunlight blond to match her summer tan still clinging to her skin and clear brown eyes. Brown like sunstone. Actually, she just reminded me of high summer in her entirety. And freckles! So many damned freckles, it was hard to keep my hands to myself. I managed. Barely.

We didn’t talk about much. Cindy asked me about the neighborhood, how it was, where the interesting spot were. Come to find out she’s a case worker for the IRS. Well, she said she worked for the government, but after a couple follow up questions, it was easy to figure out. She’s on temporary assignment here and originally from Phoenix. Too bad. I won’t say no to a nice, pretty neighbor though. I only thank the Gods I was alone when she came to the door. My sister would’ve had a field day with my unintended flirting.

Okay. Not completely unintended. Still.

Got the paperwork back from the court, stamped and ready to mail to the bastard cheater. I want this year to be over. Soon. Very soon.

I hope.

Blessed be.

03

Response is filed with the court.

The paperwork for this debacle is tedious. And it has to be submitted in triplicate, in person on actual paper. In this day and age, I surprised we can’t to all of this online, like literally everything else, but no. The copies are supposed to come back to me through the mail. One is to be sent to the ex, the other I’m to keep for my records. I’m not sure the ex will sign for the papers, but I have to try. Ugh.

Jack took to the basics of the Rede easily. When I explained it to him, Angie interjecting snide little comments the whole time about my teaching style, Jack rolled his eyes and said, “I know all that Mom.”

I didn’t understand, at first, how he knew all this already. He hasn’t been messing with my Book and my mom and sister know better than to start Jack’s teachings without me. I started asking questions.

“What do you mean, you know?”

“They’re the rules, Mom. Of course I know.”

“Where did you learn them?”

“They’re the house rules, Mom.”

Oh. Later, after Jack had gone to play with some of the neighborhood kids, Angie called me a scatterbrained dumb ass. Some days, I feel like it. Parenting is ridiculous. I love it.

Blessed be.

02

Process server showed up on the doorstep the other day. I guess the ex, who’s name I refuse to use because he’s a bastard, had filed for divorce months ago. I’m only just now finding out. I thought I had more time to get back on my feet before dealing with this.

Angie cackled at me.

I’m so damned annoyed about it all. Angry is too strong a word, so annoyed works. Good thing my mom is an old hand at this divorce nonsense, so I leave the paperwork for her to parse. She’ll tell me the next steps I need to take.

The colorful threads in my supply box survived the move without tangling, thank the great Gods. What I needed most at this moment is time. And a little chaos couldn’t hurt. A little bit of knot magick to slow the matter down a a bit. Nothing big or flashy.

I set up a candle with a simple wish etched into it and started on my threads. Ra, my big orange tabby and obstinate familiar, was loafed against my leg and watching with his customary watchfulness. My boy Jack came into my closet-sized room with his kitten familiar at his heels. Her name is Isis and, like all familiars I’ve ever encountered, she chose him.

This wasn’t the first time Jack had ever seen me casting, so he knew to wait until I was done before he started asking questions. I haven’t really explained what being a witch was and as I finished the last of the knots, I figured maybe it was time I began his instruction. He was in a house full of them, after all.

I’ll start with the basics after dinner. First, I have a sister to give a stern lecture to.

Blessed be.2